Review: I Want to Die But I Want to Eat Tteokbokki

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Hello bookish friends! I’m back with a review for a book that I was soo looking forward to reading when my NetGalley request was approved: I Want to Die But I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Se-hee. Did I request the book specifically for the title? Possibly. That’s unconfirmed.

PLOT

Marketed as a self-help therapy memoir, this book follows the author, Baek, through 12 weeks of therapy as she tries to uncover the cause of her depressive mood, anxiety, and feelings of hopelessnesses.

NO-SPOILER REVIEW

I really wanted to like this book so much. I’m basically primed to love most memoirs, especially when they involved mental health issues. The formatting and style of this one just didn’t work for me. Almost the entirety of the book is straight up transcripts from the author’s therapy sessions. Not a direct quote from the book, but to give you an idea, nearly every page looks like this:

Psychiatrist: Did you think about what we discussed before?

Me: Yes, I did, but I still don’t know what to do exactly.

Psychiatrist: Well, have you thought of the various outcomes of each decision?

Me: Yes, I have, but… (two paragraphs about a very specific decision making process the author thought through)

I’m so proud of this journey to recovery that Baek went on, but it’s just not compelling to read someone else’s rather mundane therapy session transcripts. It’s not that readers won’t be able to relate to some of the things Baek is going through, but I don’t find this book to be a memoir nor a self-help book somehow.

It doesn’t have enough self-reflection or closure to qualify as a memoir for me, but someone else’s personalized therapy is not fitting as a self-help process for the general public. It’s specific to one person, and if I’m being quite frank, I don’t think the therapist did the best job of identifying what was going on with Baek.

My remaining hope is that some people will read this book and it will destigmatize therapy for them so they can seek personalized help for themselves. As far as this book working as a memoir or self-help book — neither for me, unfortunately.

Thank you to NetGalley and Bloomsbury for this e-ARC in exchange for my honest review.

ARC Review: We Spread by Iain Reid

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Happy spooky season, readers! Today I have an ARC book review for my first horror read of the season, We Spread by Iain Reid. You might be familiar with this author’s work if you’ve read I’m Thinking of Ending Things. The book is set to release later this month, so check it out if this spoiler-free review sounds up your alley!

I’ll start first by saying that this writer has such an ability to write eerie prose that makes me feel claustrophobic and uncomfortable. Both books I’ve read of Reid’s have pulled me in right from the start; I truly think he’s an excellent writer.

Plot

The book start with 92-year-old former artist, Penny, is living in the remnants of the apartment she shared with her lifelong partner until he passed away. She’s lonely, frightened, and slowly withering away with no social contact to keep her brain engaged. As her health begins to fail, she experiences a fall which lands her in a long-term facility.

Allegedly, this facility is one that she and her partner had picked out themselves back when they were making end of life arrangements. “Allegedly” because Penny doesn’t remember doing this at all. But once she gets to the facility, Penny flourishes under the staff’s care. She’s painting again for the first time in years and she’s socializing with the other patients- both things she thought she would never do again.

Soon after her arrival though, Penny begins feeling paranoid as she starts losing her grip on time. They never leave the facility and all the days are blending together. Penny doesn’t remember the things she has allegedly said and done there. She starts to wonder if her mental capabilities are truly failing her or if there is something more sinister going on.

Spoiler-Free Review

I didn’t enjoy this book as much as I enjoyed I’m Thinking of Ending Things. I loved the awkward and quirky creepy factor of that book. This book felt similarly paranoid, but without the clean explanation of what was happening. We Spread leans heavily into ambiguousness to the point that, from the other reviews I’ve read and from my own experience, it’s very difficult to ‘get’ what was actually happening. Some people are okay with just the Vibes in a book, but for me it felt like a bit of a waste to have no real conclusion or understanding in the end.

That being said, this is the first time I’ve read a horror book through the perspective of an elderly woman and that was an experience all on its own. I think most of us have some level of fear when it comes to aging and dying. This book plays on all of those fears and then some. I still enjoyed reading this book because Reid’s books are a whole ‘experience’ for me. I just wish the ending had been a bit more concrete.

August Hopefuls TBR List

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Hi readers! It has been a while since we’ve had a monthly TBR list, but I’m almost done working through my ARC book list and if I can finish these books this month, I can start requesting again!! The first two are book club reads so that are must reads for me. The last three are the advanced reader books I still need to read. 🙂

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer

One of my book club reads for the month. I haven’t read very much nonfiction this year so I’m looking forward to this one. In fact, I started listening to the audiobook last night and the author’s narration is superb so far!

Drawing Down the Moon by Margot Adler

Second book club read of the month! My library hold on this also came through overnight so yay for witchy things. This book is older and I’m hoping it has held up well through the years, but expecting to need to show some leniency there.

We Spread by Iain Reid

This is my second book by Reid, the first being “I’m Thinking of Ending Things” which I quite enjoyed. The book is about an elderly painter who slowly starts losing grip on time and becomes suspicious of long-term care residence where she’s staying. Not sure what to expect, but excited to find out!

I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Sehee

Another ARC that has been sitting on my to read list for a while now, I really only requested this one for that amazing title. The book is a therapy memoir which from my understanding is also part self-help book. I don’t have a great track record with that genre, but I’m ready to give it another shot because I do love it when it’s done well.

We Are All So Good at Smiling by Amber McBride

The last of my outstanding ARC books, if I can finish this one and the above two this month, I can go back to requesting! This young adult novel-in-verse that deals with depression and trauma sounds right up my alley. I have big expectations for this one!

Reader Question: What is on your book list of August hopefuls?

ARC Book Review: Husband Material

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Happy release day to Alexis Hall’s Husband Material, the much awaited sequel to Boyfriend Material! This was one of my most anticipated reads of the year after I devoured the first book in the series within a couple days.

Plot

In case anyone is wondering, yes, you need to read the first book in the series before this one. Husband Material is not a standalone novel and is a direct continuation of the relationships and storyline from Boyfriend Material. In this addition, Luc and Oliver have been together for a couple years now and we’re all about DOMESTICATION now.

Everyone around them seems to be getting married and Luc is feeling the social pressure big time as he nears thirty. But can a historically-renowned commitment-phobe like Lucien finally take the deep dive into a wedded bliss?

Characters

One of the biggest things I was hoping for in this follow up was to see all of Luc’s friends. I love the supporting characters in Boyfriend Material, so if you’re like me, rest assured that you’ll be getting a hefty dose of all of Luc’s friends, family, and even his CRAPP coworkers.

In fact, the first chunk of the book is Lucien fulfilling his duties as maid of honour to his bestie. And yes, it’s as cute as it sounds!

Spoiler-free Review

I’ll readily admit that I’m somewhat torn on this book. It’s so difficult to give a clear, levelheaded review when you feel connected to the characters. Hall’s witty banter and sarcastic, troubled lead are both relatable and hilarious. But while I initially felt so excited to jump back into the lives of Lucien and Oliver, I found myself getting bored with this book which didn’t happen once with the first book in the series.

This book falls into a lot of those annoying romance book cliches that my favorite romance books are moving beyond at this point. The endless antics and miscommunications started getting old quickly. Y’all, just talk. to. each. other. I loved Luc in the first book despite his flaws, but in the second book even I was getting sick of his shit and that is not a good sign.

I really think this was a modern take on Four Weddings and a Funeral (yes, the 90s rom-com) and some of the magic between Lucien and Oliver got lost in that. I just wanted more development from this, but it felt like we were stalled with an insecure lead that I didn’t want to be stuck with, even as a reader.

But it’s not all bad! All of the humorous elements from the first novel are fully intact, down to Lucien’s coworkers who wouldn’t understand a joke if it smacked them across the head. Another thing this book tackles is the history of Lucien and Oliver’s lives before they met each other. The concept of being a “good” gay which involves heavy partying and being a “bad” gay which involves settling down is something that Lucien and Oliver struggle with given their respective personal histories and I thought that was a really cool addition to the storyline.

In all, the first novel in this series was a 4 or 4.5 for me and this was more around a 3 to 3.5, so still a decent read which felt comfortable, but didn’t exactly meet prior expectations either.

Thank you to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Casablanca for sharing an advanced reader copy in exchange for my honest review.

July Book Wrap Up

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Still in summertime reading mode, which for me means reading very few books because I’m doing other warm weather things, BUT I did finish a few books in July so here’s my monthly wrap up!

Wolves by Simon Ings

This is my standout read for the month. To be honest, I probably read so few books in July partially because I wasn’t really enjoying what I was reading. Wolves is the exception because this genre-defying book was just delightful.

Which once again makes me question Goodreads ratings because this is the lowest rated of all 3 of my July reads by far!

Carrie Soto is Back by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Read this as an ARC. You can check out my review here. This was a 3-star read for me. I love TJR, but I couldn’t get over how much this book is just about tennis. Like, yes, of course the book is going to have tennis in it, but the fact that the first 20% or so is just tennis matches and tennis gameplay is way too much for this non-sports fan.

Sea of Tranquility by Emily St. John Mandel

This was my first book by this author and I was really expecting a lot given all I’ve heard about her work. Unsurprisingly, her writing was wonderful. I love short chapters and beautiful prose. This book delivers on both fronts. What was missing for me was connection with the characters. I just didn’t feel like I was getting a good sense of them. I also didn’t love how much this book screamed “2020 pandemic.” It really seemed like something that was written with the thought of, oh, we’re in a pandemic, I should write a book about that. I’m not sure how well that element of the story stands up even just a couple years our from the start of the pandemic.